A Crypto-Trading Hamster Is Doing Better Than Most Professionals
A crypto-trading hamster might have one of the best minds for business we've seen.
This article is more than 2 years old
Since June of this year, Mr. Goxx has been a force to reckon with trading in cryptocurrencies. Granted, his first month out of the chute was a little rough, but he righted himself and has since seen remarkable results. Oh yeah, Mr. Goxx is a crypto hamster.
Care to see Mr. Goxx in action? Check him out below.
Working out of what appears to be the most high-tech hamster cage in existence, Mr. Goxx the crypto hamster has been so successful that he has outdueled the likes of Warren Buffett, the FTSE 100, and the Dow Jones when it comes to choosing the right cryptocurrency.
Mr. Goxx’s “office” is set up in conjunction with his normal living cage. Each day, the business-minded crypto hamster enters his “trading office” where a live stream Twitch begins, and a Mr. Goxx Twitter account informs his followers that Mr. Goxx is on the clock.
Crypto hamster Mr. Goxx then boards his “intention wheel”, a hamster wheel designed for him to select which cryptocurrency he’d like to dabble in. As his wheel rolls through the different options, next to it there are two tunnels – one for buy, and one for sell.
When Mr. Goxx selects his cryptocurrency, he runs through one of the tunnels. Electronics that are wired to his trading office then complete the trade based on Mr. Goxx’s highly technical choice.
The crypto hamster had a rough start to his career. He first got his little paws wet in June. With €326 in hand (which is around $378), he placed an order for Stellar (XLM). One short month later that included 95 orders and Mr. Goxx was down 7.3%.
Unphased by any of this, Mr. Goxx kept doing Mr. Goxx things and as of September 27, 2021, Mr. Goxx’s impressive career performance is up a whopping 19.41%.
If you’re wondering who or what is behind the crypto hamster, they are two unnamed men, in their 30’s, out of Germany. As to why they started, they say via the BBC, “We felt that everything keeps getting more expensive these days and building savings is super-hard to achieve with high rents to pay.”
“It seems like most people from our generation see no other chance than throwing a lot of their savings on the crypto market, without having a clue what’s going on there,” they continued. “We were joking about whether my hamster would be able to make smarter investment decisions than we humans do.”
The duo has not yet offered an explanation as to why they prefer to keep their identities hidden, but they have no problem letting Mr. Goxx take the glory. So, what first started as a COVID project to try to remain sane has now turned into a successful venture.
As for how they came up with the crypto hamster’s name, the name refers to the potential hazards one can find when trading in cryptocurrency. According to the pair, there was a company called Mt Gox that was one of the earliest and once the biggest crypto exchanges on the planet. But their success didn’t last as the company was compromised and they had hundreds of thousands of bitcoin stolen from them. This bad situation got worse as it forced them to file for bankruptcy.
As far as financial advice, we are in no position to tell you to follow Mr. Goxx’s financial acumen. It is obvious his decision-making isn’t based on science. But if he has been successful in outperforming Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway then maybe a glance in Mr. Goxx’s direction won’t do any harm.
What we truly want to know is, Mr. Goxx, what’s your secret?
